The Low Down on the Chop Off

I seem to have caused some confusion with my story about the penis snatchers of British Columbia.

The crux of the story is true. Someone really did de-penis a statue of a nude man that was standing an British Columbia, Canada park. However, I embellished the story with an assumption that the only sort of people who harbor enough anger to do such a thing are victim oriented feminists with a bone to pick with the “patriarchy.”

I came up with this in response to a column by Susan Paynter of the Seattle PI, in which she suggests that clearly the only people that would have done such a thing are right wing evangelicals. She is seeing the world through her own victim-oriented prism.

From my perspective, it seems much more likely that angry gender feminists hacked off the poor statue’s genitals. After all, this is what they have been doing through the family courts now for over a decade. Read NOW’s web site for a while, or check out textbooks from Women’s Studies departments in major universities, and you will know what I’m talking about.

I apologize if I caused some confusion among my readers. The column was meant to be facetious and sarcastic, although my scenario of what really happened to the stone guy's schlong is just as likely as the one Paynter would have you believe.

Silly Seattle endeavors to bring you an accurate review of the news. We know that you depend on us for that and so we would never intentionally attempt to deceive you. We will be more careful next time about clarifying when a column is written in jest as opposed being actual news or intelligent analysis of it. We know that you are wondering who you can trust after reading the bogus report from the King Elections Office, and we do not want to add to your strife.

Oh, and for all of you asking when I am going to write my view on Harvard President Lawrence Summers’ comments about sex differences in science aptitude, my take on that will be coming soon. So, stay tuned to this silly channel!